For Me, To Live is Christ, and to Die is Gain
A personal reflection from Bishop Charlie Masters as he walks through cancer and its treatment.
Recently I was very honoured and grateful for the invitation from Bishop Dan to send video greetings to the ANiC diocesan synod in Vancouver (you can see it here), as I was not able to actually be there in person while seeking to recover from chemotherapy. Along the way in my video greeting I quoted Philippians 1:21, the verse referenced above as a kind of title.
I had been thinking about what passage in the Bible might summarize many of my thoughts and conclusions while reflecting on my battle with cancer. And I have found none better than these words of Paul. So, would you let me reflect briefly on them below and then on why this verse means so much to me at this time in my life.
The apostle Paul wrote these extraordinary words:
“For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labor for me. Yet which I shall choose I cannot tell. I am hard pressed between the two. My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better. But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account.”
Philippians 1:21-24
In Prison and in Cancer
When writing these words Paul was in prison in Rome and writing to a church in Philippi which he knew and loved. And, in a way, I feel something like Paul in prison, except in my case it is my battle with cancer.
As Paul reflected on his imprisonment he knew one of two things might happen:
1. Execution and death or 2. Release from prison and restoration to his traveling apostolic ministry for some time more.
Paul understood very clearly that his death might be imminent. He was not certain what the outcome would be. But he was completely at peace and not fretful at all. He was confident that the same Lord Jesus who, he wrote, was using even his imprisonment as a way to “advance the gospel” (Phil 1:12-14) could cause him to be released if He so chose.
He was certain that either way it would be the LORD’S DELIVERANCE and it would be good! Therefore he was able to say with much confidence:
“for I know that through your prayers and the help of the Spirit of Jesus Christ this will turn out for my deliverance, as it is my eager expectation and hope that I will not be at all ashamed, but that with full courage now as always Christ will be honored in my body, whether by life or by death.”
Philippians 1:19-20
But again, remember with me that the form God’s deliverance would take was not absolutely clear to Paul.
His deliverance still had two very possible forms: his death and thus immediate ushering into the nearer presence of his Saviour forever; or his release from prison, affording him the opportunity to bear more fruit, partnering with the churches that had been planted.
And so it is that he says:
“For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.”
Paul’s Good News
But to truly understand this statement and how he can state it with such conviction we need to understand Paul’s understanding of the Gospel.
The Gospel is God’s rescue through His Son Jesus (“For the Son of Man came to seek and to save the lost." Luke 19:10) who chose to lay down His life on the cross and was raised on the third day (Easter) so that our sins could be forgiven and we could be reconciled to God to live in relationship for all eternity with Him, as we were made to.
The way we receive His forgiveness is by putting our faith in that same Jesus.
“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.”
John 3:16-17
This saving happened very dramatically for Paul, a pious leader and zealous persecutor of Christ’s followers, on his way to the city of Damascus. There on the road he was met in a very real way by the Risen Lord Jesus. As a result, his life was turned upside down and rather than trusting in himself and his achievements for God to receive him, Paul began trusting only in Jesus, recognizing he too was a desperate sinner in need of saving.
In Ephesians he wrote:
“But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ–by grace you have been saved–and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.”
Ephesians 2:4-9
And then in his letter to the Church in Philippi:
“though I myself have reason for confidence in the flesh also. If anyone else thinks he has reason for confidence in the flesh, I have more: circumcised on the eighth day, of the people of Israel, of the tribe of Benjamin, a Hebrew of Hebrews; as to the law, a Pharisee; as to zeal, a persecutor of the church; as to righteousness under the law, blameless. But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith–that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death,”
Philippians 3:4-10
Gospel Confidence
So only then, after all of this– now reconciled and in relationship to Jesus– could he say of his life here on earth: “for me to live is Christ”
And if the Lord should choose to call him home by execution soon he could say:
“to die is gain” for then he would be with Jesus.
So which will it be?
He knew his preference would be to go be with Jesus immediately, which is what we’re made for. With Him is our real eternal home.
“My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better.” Philippians 1:23
But, he actually believed the Lord did have more for him to do here.
“But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account. Convinced of this, I know that I will remain and continue with you all, for your progress and joy in the faith, so that in me you may have ample cause to glory in Christ Jesus, because of my coming to you again.”
Philippians 1:24-26
Paul believed he would be released from prison for a specific purpose.
My Story
When I heard the news from the doctor that I had stage four cancer, I immediately realized that imminent death could be before me. But there was also the possibility of being restored to health for a time.
I couldn’t then and I can’t say I know now what the Lord is going to do. But I know for absolute certainty that there is heaven ahead–for which I’m made– and to be with Jesus forever is the absolute best.
My “Damascus Road” is nowhere near as dramatic as Paul’s. I was fortunate to grow up in a wonderful family, where the Lord Jesus was known, loved and served, and the gospel was proclaimed regularly, in all sorts of ways. Having said that, I myself was pretty apathetic about it (unlike my sisters). And so, although I believed at one level in my head, I certainly had not committed my life to Christ in my heart.
That all changed one weekend in the fall of 1969 at a youth retreat, which was sponsored by the Guelph Bible chapel at a ranch near Caledon. On the Saturday afternoon my collarbone was broken playing a pick-up football game. (This was the only other time I’ve had a broken bone besides April 2023 when the breaking of my arm led to the discovery of this cancer. Seemingly both breaks ushered in for me a powerful work of God.)
On the Sunday morning of the youth retreat I stayed even after the broken bone, and I heard the gospel again. And that morning I put up my hand to say I wanted to commit my life to Christ. That afternoon I went for a walk alone and invited Jesus into my life. Thus began this adventure with Him, which continues now more than 50 years later. And every day I can say even more deeply now with Paul “for me to live is Christ.”
To quote the hymn:
“Blessed Assurance,
Jesus is mine
Oh what a foretaste of glory, divine
Heir of salvation purchase of God Born of His spirit washed in His blood.
This is my story. This is my song praising my saviour all the day long.
This is my story. This is my song, praising my saviour all the day long.”
(Fanny Jane Crosby (1820-1915))
In Life and Death
I know I have heaven ahead for sure, because the promise of God is clear. One day I will be with Jesus forever. That’s not arrogance or pride. It is simple faith in the faithfulness of the Jesus, who died and rose again.
For those who know me, you won’t be surprised that I must quote another song!
“What is our hope in life and death?
Christ alone, Christ alone
What is our only confidence?
That our souls to him belong
Who holds our days within his hand?
What comes, apart from his command?
And what will keep us to the end?
The love of Christ, in which we stand
O sing hallelujah!
Our hope springs eternal
O sing hallelujah!
Now and ever we confess
Christ our hope in life and death”
(Keith Getty, Matt Boswell, Jordan Kauflin, Matt Merker, Matt Papa (2020))
But I also know God is well able to restore me to health, so that there could be some fruitful ministry ahead, even for the likes of me.
I’m not sure which will be the outcome. But I must admit, like Paul, at this stage I believe that it’s very possible that the Lord Jesus, who is well able to heal, is going to heal me and restore me to health for a time for a purpose. And there may be ahead some time or some years of what I pray would be fruitful gospel ministry, along with other dear Christians, which I pray will include you too.
This Earthly Pilgrimage
Either way, for whatever days are given to me in this earthly pilgrimage, it is my prayer that I can be proclaiming the good news of Jesus and inviting people like you and everyone to come to Jesus. Because anyone and everyone who believes also will be with Jesus forever; which is what you are made for, as am I, as was Paul.
Please do not miss out on this incredible forgiveness and life in Jesus, so that you too can say “for me to live in Christ to die is gain.” And then, dear friends, share this amazing news with the world that so desperately needs rescue and life and hope of Christ Jesus.
Looking to Him only!
Charlie Masters
“For God has not destined us for wrath, but to obtain salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ, who died for us so that whether we are awake or asleep we might live with him. Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.”
1 Thessalonians 5:9-11